A Little of This and That

      I noticed today that I forgot to leave a movie and song of the day on my last post. I decided I will give two songs and two movies today to make up for it.
      Today, being the bright spring morning as it was, first it snowed then sleeted then heavy snow then rain and now sunshine. I mentioned before the odd weather we have here and now I am once again wishing I lived somewhere else. I would prefer a beach setting but I also love white winters (not to mention I've always been a sucker for lighthouses - rain, snow, or shine).
      I tried knitting a scarf today because I want the practice so I can make a baby blanket for my brother's baby. I've been wanting to make a baby blanket to get the practice for when I have my own child but I haven't known anyone having a baby until now. I think I might be more excited for the baby than my brother is though because I can't go into a store now without looking at the baby department with a longing sensation. If I am to be honest with myself, I've been feeling like I am waiting for my life to happen instead of living. When I'm not working, I'm normally by myself with no other human interactions aside from my immediate family members. I think getting away from where I currently live might help but there is no possible way I could afford to move unless I did buy a house (because so far a house payment would be cheaper than paying rent). The only problem I have with buying a house is that I don't really feel comfortable that I have job security. Not to mention if I did ever find a job in my dream area (the area I really want to live: ie near Wilmington, NC) I would be stuck with a house in NY or PA that I would have to sell first before I could move. Problems like these are why most days I wish I had never gone to college. The debt that I am currently paying in college loans could pay for a really nice house and I would actually be paying less per month because the current student loans I have equal $800 a month for the next ten years - most mortgages are for at a minimum of fifteen years meaning the monthly payment would be far less than $800.
      I try not to dwell on my problems because I know that owning a house, renting, living where I want, and student loans are petty problems compared to the real problems people across the globe face. I know there are young mothers who don't know how they're going to feed their kids or where they'll sleep tonight and I know somewhere there is a kid who is considering suicide today because he is being bullied so bad at school and no one understands. These people are the ones who have real problems that often don't have solutions and I know my problems are nothing but a small irksome that I really shouldn't be hovering on.
     

      To lighten the mood a little before I depart:

Movie of the day 1: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 1
Movie of the day 2: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2


Song of the day 1: O' Children by Nick Cave

Song of the day 2: This is War by 30 Seconds to Mars

New and Improved

      I updated the site today to give it a new look. I like to change it up because even I get bored looking at the same site over and over and over. A new look is a simple way to change it up a little.

      I found the house that I love but I will never be able to afford it. It cost a little over $100,000 and is a little smaller than my dream house but it was still really really nice.

      I also found a practical house and it is only $35,000 on almost 3 acres of land but it needs a lot of work and it is in North Carolina. In perspective, I live in New York now and work in Pennsylvania. This house would have to be my weekend fixer-upper (and possibly allow my parents to rent it from me while I stayed in New York. This is a big decision and I am going to need a while to think about it. I would have to sell my truck to make the down payment but the mortgage would be $2 less than the truck payment is now. To be completely honest, I really don't think it's likely I will buy the place but it is nice to dream.

   In other news, I finished the Harry Potter series of books again at work. This time it only took me 6 days to read all 7 books. I still cried when Sirius died in book 5 and Snape died in book 7 - I think I always will; ⏃ Always. It is still hard for me to grasp that there will never be another HP book and it makes me want to cry. I liked the movies but the books will forever be my cryptonite. My favorite in order are: The Order of the Phoenix, The Deathly Hallows, The Prisoner of Azcaban, The Sorcerer's Stone, The Half-Blood Prince, The Goblet of Fire, and the Chamber of Secrets. 

      My parents returned from their trip and they brought me back two cases of Ale8 from Kentucky. If you've never had it, it tastes like a Mellow Yellow flavored Root Beer. It is only made and sold in Kentucky and I had them make an unscheduled stop just to pick me up some. I recommend you try it at least once if you're ever in Kentucky.

      I started a tumblr site today but it didn't live up to my standards so I closed my account already. I still think I prefer blogger's site, I just think tumblr is flashier. I also switched shifts today so that I could work more days. I am now on night shift and working 4 days a week instead of 3. I think having 3 days off a week will be plenty and if I want to take a vacation at any time, all I have to do is request the time off. I think working 4 days will give me enough money to catch up all my bills and hopefully pay off my truck sooner so that I can start saving up for a house or an apartment.

I think I will call it a night now so have a good one.

Of A Generation

   Hello all and sorry for my lapse in writing. I lost the urge to write for a while and have only just rediscovered its lure. I have been working for my new job at a security company contracted out to work for gas companies. We make sure that the sites are secure and safe while they drill for natural gas. I will say that I was unsure of the 'frac' process and the dangers it could possess to the community and the environment before I was hired but after I became more education on the subject I really learned the immensity of the safety precautions companies like Shell have in place to protect the community and the environment as well as its workers. I don't find the process as dangerous as I once did because I know more about it and I think this is true for many people. I think the majority of people against fracking don't really understand the process and have no idea of the ways companies are protecting people from the potential dangers. Someone really can't complain that their water is contaminated if it was already found to be contaminated 50 years ago when fracking wasn't even in the area. (On a side note, I found the use of the word frac to be hilarious in this industry because it was used in place of a curse word on the popular television series Battlestar Galactica [spelled frak]).
   April 1st or April Fools Day if you prefer was the first day of trout and salmon fishing in NY State (and also Fred and George Weasley's Birthday!). I had to work so I went Monday morning. I froze my behind off (almost literally). My fingers were so frozen they felt like they were on fire and I still didn't catch anything. I adopted a dog from the local Humane Society. She is a 7 year old pitbull named Lilly (like Lilly Potter from the Harry Potter series). She loves to play and cuddle.
   At work, I have a lot of down time. My superiors tell us that we can do anything we want to keep us awake as long as we don't fall asleep on the job. To keep myself awake, I've been reading the Harry Potter books by JK Rowling. I read all 7 books in 7 days and watched all 8 movies in a day and a half. This has hardly held me over at work because I am now reading the books again and will probably watch the movies again as well. I grew up on these books. I was in 6th grade when I read the first one and I had to catch up but I was one who waited for each new book to come out at Borders or Barnes and Nobles. I went to the midnight showing of all but the first two movies and I cried when the credits rolled for Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2. I think this series of books helped raise one of the most knowledgeable, caring, thoughtful kids of a generation and I am saddened to know that kids today don't have the morals and anticipation that the Harry Potter Series brought out in us. When I actually think about what kids these days have to look forward to (Twilight, the Hunger Games, etc) I am actually fearful because these books cannot compare to the HP books. One of my favorite things I found online was this quote, "Twilight has Forks but Harry Potter has a theme park in Orlando." (I sooooo want to go to The Wonderful World of Harry Potter).

   I've also started making videos on Youtube again now that I have the time. I am getting better at using my Sony Vegas which is allowing better quality videos (even though my personal appearance needs a better quality still). I've been doing a lot of stuff online to pass my time and I found a site called Stealth Operatives which is a rpg sort of like Mob Wars except you are a spy and you fight the bad guys. I am also waiting for Pottermore to open up. The website says it will be open the beginning of April (I think they need to hurry up). I was hoping it would be a mmorpg like Lord of the Rings online or World of Warcraft but I think it's just going to be a forum/reading type of thing which is still cool just not amazingly cool.
   I was also watching a new series called the River on ABC. I found it because Bruce Greenwood is in it and I really like him as an actor. It mixes the action horror genre very well and it is a nice escape to lose myself in. It is also a relief that new shows can be made well considering shows that I use to watch like Eureka and One Tree Hill are in their final seasons. I know Grey's Anatomy and NCIS will probably be packing in withing the next few years as well just because they have been around so long (because they're AWESOME).
   I can't wait for the weather to warm up so I can start up my outdoor activities again. I found some trails in my area I want to hike and my tent is still ready for camping. I am excited now because I found that Letchworth State Park in New York is only $20 to camp at night and that park is beautiful in the summer. I will have to let Lilly get a little practice before we tackle anything too difficult but I am excited anyway.
 
   With that, I will leave you (sorry it was so long today - lots on my mind)

Song of the Day: 9 Crimes - Damien Rice
Movie of the Day: Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone

Waiting

      First, THE PATRIOTS ARE GOING TO THE SUPERBOWL!!!!!!!!!!

      Okay, now that's out of my system, I had my interview and drug test for a security job on Thursday and Friday. I figured I would be working by this Friday so I quit at the factory. I still haven't got the call to go for training yet though so now I'm anxious.
      I've been having a pretty rotten week so far because my dog is sick. She is a six year old Rottweiler who is normally full of energy but I think she has stomache cancer because she can't keep most food down and she won't move very much at all. We've moved her from her coop into the carport so that she'd stay warm and we give her asprin to keep her comfortable. I cried all the way to my drugtest on Friday and I spent most of Saturday outside with her. I don't have the money to take her to the vet and I don't think I could handle them putting her to sleep. I figure if it's illegal to kill people, why can't dogs have a chance. I know she's going to die but as long as she's on medication and not in pain I don't see why she can't live as long as she can. It's sad because I watched some videos on youtube where Rottweilers and babies played together and it hurts to know that none of my kids will every get to know this great dog. Here's a video I made of her:

Movie of the day: Hatchi a Dogs Tale

Song of the day: Until the Day I Die by Story of the Year

Decisions Decisions

      Today I missed a day at my new job because I had an interview for different one. Now I have a job in a factory doing easy work, an offer to start an office position the beginning of February, and now a position working security for the gas wells. I'm leaning toward taking the security job because it pays more than the other two, it is only three days a week, it is closer to where I live, and it is out of NY. I'm still hoping that I can get some overtime from it so that I have extra cash.
      My brother's party is tomorrow night. This is upsetting because I get up for work at 4am mornings so tomorrow when I get home, I want to be able to go to bed and have a nice peaceful sleep. A bunch of college kids boxing, drinking, and trying to blow their eadrums out is not my idea of a relaxing night. I think I may have to bring out the earplugs and headphones just to get to sleep.
      I finished the Percy Jackson series yesterday which saddens me knowing that the series is over. Yes there's the Heroes of Olympus series and the Kane Chronicals but I don't like the Kane Chronicals and the Heroes of Olympus doesn't fill the void. To make up for my empty time, I've started working on my story again. I always love working on it but my biggest difficulty is the beginning. The introduction has been killing me since I started the story in high school.

Movie of the day: Undercover Angel
Song of the day: Say that You Made Love to Me by Ten Year Vamp
(sorry no youtube video, I couldn't find one so I put the link to their website where you can listen to the song)
http://www.tenyearvamp.com/music.html

You can't Choose Your Family (but I wish you could)

      Well today was my first day at my new job. It went pretty well, the job is easy and I really like the sitting down part. I hate standing 8-12 hours a day on concrete in steel toe shoes. I'm enjoying the sitting down in a comfy chair wearing my Converse All-Stars. The only problem is that it is still a factory position and I've been offered an office position somewhere else that would start the beginning of February.
      Even though my career is looking up, the family situation is going downhill like a rollercoaster. I've managed to alienate myselft by pissing off my mother and my brother. To start with, I should just say that my father and I don't get along well at all. For me, this is because he has been telling me that I'm fat and stupid my entire life (along with some other verbal abuses that I will not mention here). So I already have 'daddy issues'. I pissed off my brother when I moved all of my stuff into our grandparents old house two summers ago. I was going to move in as soon as I felt I could pay rent to my parents and I didn't want to move in during the winter because at the time the place had no heat. My brother breaks up with his fiance and decides he's going to move in last winter. I wait until April to actually move in (ie sleep in my own bed). Not only did he move all of my stuff into a different room so that he could have mine, he brings in a ton of cats who would rather shit on the floor instead of the litter box, he put all of his dishes in the kitchen, moved my kitchen table out to replace it with his, puts all of his furniture in the living room (putting my chair in my bedroom), decorates the kitchen/living room/bathroom with only his stuff (not allowing me to put any of my stuff anywhere except my bedroom), and now he gets angry when I put anythingat all in the living room saying that he was there first. My mother is now angry at me because I complain to her about my brother and his stupid cats. She is mad because we have to take our clothes to her house because our washer broke.
      I'm ready to say "screw 'em" but I can't get away because I have too much college debt and I don't make enough to cover a transition anywhere else. For the moment, I've taken the attitude to ignore them all. It will help now that I'm working - I can afford to not be home at all. I've also taken it upon myself to piss my brother off even more just for spite. I refuse to do dishes (which doesn't matter cuz I use paper and plastic so the rest is his anyway), I've stopped cleaning everything except my own bedroom, I moved my chair and my dvd shelf out into the living room (which he hated), and to top it off I put pink panther cloth on the stand next to my chair with a pink pillow and blanket in the chair. He wants me to stay at our parents this weekend because he is having a big party for his birthday. I'm not going anywhere because he can't kick me out of my own place (and I don't trust him or his friends to sleep, have sex, or puke in my bed. I've also thought about bringing my Rottweiler in the house to keep his cats at bay but with it being so cold outside, I don't want her to get sick. My brother says that he is going to find somewhere else to live after he graduates in May but I don't want to get my hopes up.  I guess for now I will simply keep doing what I'm doing (and I know it's childish and immature but whatever).

Movie of the day: Some Like it Hot
Song of the day: Hey You by Pink Floyd

New England Patriots

 

      I am an avid New England Patriots so I would like to encourage everyone to celebrate their win over Denver and advancement through the post-season. I thought the game was amazing to watch even though they were ahead through the entire game starting from kickoff at the beginning. I am a Tom Brady fan and I have to explain that I was so before they won their first Superbowl. I, like so many others, was lost after September 11th and I wanted to show my pride in the United States. I loved football and when I learned there was a team called the Patriots whose colors were red, white, and blue I was immediately hooked. The Patriots with their very handsome young quarterback were my healing mechanism that year. I've rooted for them ever since despite harrassment from my father and my college friends. When I obtained my first Tom Brady jersey this year for Christmas, it was the best Christmas I've had in years (as a fun fact, I also have a build-a-bear in New England Patriots outfit).
      In other news, we finally have some snow - which is awesom beyond belief. I finally got to drive my truck on snow-covered roads with little problems. I've come across another new band I like - The Boy and His Machine. I found them from a clearance cd at Hot Topic which is one of my favorite ways to find new bands. It is how I found Asking Alexandria, Dan Erickson, and Rocky Loves Emily.
      I also have 2 new jobs. I will be working in a factory starting Monday working on the electrical wiring and then in February I will start training for my first office job. The office job really has me excited because the facility looks great, all of the people seemed to be friendly, and everyone seemed to be close to my same age (as opposed to my last job where EVERYONE was above 40).
      In hopes of having a good year and in the spirit of change, I am considering cutting my hair so that I have bangs again. I haven't had them since elementary school but I've been in an Abby Sciuto mood (NCIS) which is leaving me with the urge to die my hair black again as well. I'm still unsure because I don't really know if I could pull off the goth pigtail look though:

 

Movie of the day: Au Pair 3
Song of the day: Impressive by Junior Doctor